Many families believe that they already know what they want and think about each of the above topics, but often they are not talked about or made clear from the beginning. Then parents become angry when children don’t follow the rules. Talk about or posting the rules helps!
| Eating/Meals |
What are the meals and times eaten? |
| What is the style for each? |
All together? Children watch TV? TV on? Waiting for everyone to sit down? Prayer prior to meal? What do you do when you are finished? When you are not hungry? Who cleans up? |
| Eating between Meals/Snacks? |
It is ok? What do you eat? Where do you eat? |
| Playing: Inside |
Where? Where not to? Where are toys kept and when is it ok to take them out? Who picks them up? Noise level? Type of play allowed in the house? Are other kids allowed in the house? |
| Playing: Outside |
When are you allowed outside? Where may you play? With whom? When must you come back in? Whom do you tell/ask? |
| Personal Care |
When do you wash-up? Brush teeth? Wash hair? Take bath/shower? Cleaning up the bathroom --- towels, toothpaste, soap? |
| Clothes |
Who washes, folds, and gathers dirty clothes? When are clothes washed? Who chose clothes to be worn? What is considered appropriate attire? |
| Chores |
What are they and what happens if not done? ( See Example) |
| Telephone |
Use When, with whom, manners to be used when answering? |
| Sleeping |
Bedtime, where is it ok to sleep? To nap? Who sleeps with whom? |
| Television |
When is it turned on? What is allowed to be watched? Who turns it on? Where is it watched? For how long? |
| Family Activities |
What are they? Are they negotiable? Who does things with whom? When is it ok to be yourself? What is ok to do by yourself? |
| School/Education |
Level of expected academic achievement? Doing homework – when, where, with whom? Behavior in School? |
| Rest and Relaxation |
What do you do with spare time? What is lazy? How much spare time do you need? |
| Communication Rules |
How are feelings and emotions expressed? What are acceptable levels of expression? How do you know how other members are feeling? What do you do? What do you hope happens? Does it? How are decisions made? How are conflicts resolved when members disagree? |
| Religion |
Is it a family decisions? Individual? Attending church? What if you don’t want to go? Participation while there? |
